I felt it while I was talking with him about a possibility for consulting work.  Heaviness in the pit of my stomach.  Not quite a knot.  A weight. Sinking feeling.

In the past I wouldn’t have noticed it.  I noticed it now.  In the past I would have ignored it.  I’m not ignoring it now.

Peter Scazzero says this in “Emotionally Healthy Spirituality”,

The reality is that so often our bodies know our feelings before our minds.

And so I’m paying attention.

The first time I talked with him I was pretty excited. Not this time.  This time there’s the weight.  And yet as much as I want to pay attention to my body’s response, I don’t want to simply trust it without question either.

What if that was fear?  Or doubt?

As much as I’ve learned not to simply trust my intellect to analyze the situation, I also don’t simply trust my body either.

So what’s a person to do when they’re torn?  –Subject it to evaluation.  Physical, emotional, spiritual.  That’s what I’m doing next.  With the help of a trusted friend.  Not to help me make the decision, but to help me talk it out.  See the pitfalls in my thinking.

If you find yourself in a similar situation, don’t just trust your mind.  It’s easily tricked.  Don’t just trust your heart either.  It can be difficult to interpret its intent.  Use both.  And put it in writing.  Your head can’t possibly balance all the thoughts or weight the criteria.  You end up focusing on a few that stick out in the moment.

I’ve got some tools I use to help me make decisions.  If you want a copy, leave a comment or send an email to  I’m happy to share. Some are my own, and others are borrowed from people I deeply respect.

If you’ve made a decision that you’re proud of, why not comment too?  And share how you did it?  We can learn from one another.


Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

  • Joining the prayers for discernment in this time of waiting, Kathleen. And yes, I’d like a copy of the thoughts on decision making you’ve gathered. Thank you!

    • Thank you for praying, Laurie. I’ll write an update soon.
      Will send you a copy. Just have to make some tweaks to make it user-friendly to someone who hasn’t used it before.

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