I almost missed it.  A conversation with a young man who’s had an experience that’s transformed his life and life’s journey.  I almost missed it.  I would have missed it.

But I didn’t.  And I’m so grateful.

Yesterday was Retirement Day Two.  I’m still kind of in shock.  My schedule has been completely upended.  I’m not sure what day it is.  I’m not quite sure what to do with myself yet.  And it still feels like I’m on vacation.

Except I know I’m not.

I was making butternut squash, and wanted to sprinkle it with cinnamon before roasting.  I love cinnamon, and use it a lot. I went to the cupboard, pulled out my old cinnamon canister (that I keep pouring new stuff into because it works better than the new containers), and shook it.  It felt empty.

I opened it, tried to sprinkle the cinnamon, and almost nothing came out.

I woke the morning of December 20^th with Jerry on my mind.  The 13^th anniversary of his death.  How could I honor him in a special way, and also acknowledge that I’m in a new season of life?  One that includes leaving my 36-year career in less than two weeks?

I pulled out my pad and started writing.  I do this often – just write whatever is on my heart.  No filter.

Did you know that you’re promised joy? Psalm 30 says, “Weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.”  Yet sometimes we just don’t feel it.  It seems elusive.

And sometimes we have to choose joy before it will find us.  It feels so far away.  Sometimes joy is optional.

Don’t you wish it was always that easy?  Taking a pill and your problem is solved?  Maybe in 30 minutes…or 7 days.  Presto-change-o: fill the prescription, take the medicine.  And you’re all better.

If only it were that simple.

Last week I attended the Podcast Movement Conference in California.  It was the first time I’d gone, and wasn’t sure what to expect.  As the time got closer, I wondered if I should even go at all.  It’s such a long trip, and I’ve been traveling so much lately that I’m pretty worn out.  And I’m not crazy about huge crowds either.  But in the end I decided to go.

I learned so much there – and it wasn’t really about podcasting.

What does strength look like? The Incredible Hulk?  Atlas – who could hold up the world?  Mohammad Ali – one of the greatest heavyweight fighters ever?

What does strength look like?

We were building our first house.  The project manager had taken the stock plan for the Cape Cod model and marked it up with our changes.  Create a linen closet in the downstairs bathroom, move the back door. Use a more traditional-sized window in the downstairs.  Use this flooring instead of that flooring.  Reconfigure the kitchen to make it more efficient.  All documented.  All on the plan.

Yet every day when my husband went to check on the house, there was something wrong.  Back and forth with the contractor.  Fix it.  Change it.

Then there was the sheetrock guy who appeared drunk on the job.  The painter who tracked red door paint on his shoes on the unfinished hardwood floor, which then had to be sanded off.

Building a house seemed such a good idea at the time.  Now?  We weren’t sure.

What do you do to keep going when you’re not sure if you can take it anymore?

Guess what?  The year is almost half over already.  Five months in, and the time is flying by.  Many kids are already out of school, my friend Ruth's daughter graduated from college, and we just celebrated Memorial Day.  I thought it was a good time to check in, see how you're doing, and how I can best serve you.  

I've created a short survey so I can hear what's on your mind and heart.  What brings you joy…and what leaves you in a cold sweat.  I want to know how to better serve you in the coming months.

Would you take a few minutes to fill out the survey?  By doing so, you will help me to help you.  How?  Because you will help me make my content even more interesting and relevant to you.

The survey is anonymous.  I won't be able to tell if you responded or not.  So even though I won't know who said what, I want to hear your voice.  Your voice matters.  So let it be heard.  There are only a few questions, and it should take less than 3 minutes to complete.

Yes! I'm happy to help. Take me to the survey.

The survey will be open until June 22, 2017.  I'll compile the results and report the findings in a blog post.  As always, if you want to reach out to me directly for any reason, go to the Contact Me page.  Comments are also welcome below.

Thanks in advance for your help, and have a wonderful summer!