You know the story I told a while back about how I thought differently about where to grow my herbs?  And they were flourishing in their new spot?  You know how the basil in particular was thriving – probably about 4 times the size it’s been in previous years?

Well, I didn’t end up with any.

Here’s what happened.  I kept not harvesting it.  And by the time I finally went out there, almost all the leaves had dropped off or turned brown from frost.

(c) Kathleen Thompson This is all that was left.

There are some palatable explanations. Like, I wanted to give it as much chance to grow as big as possible.  Or, I was traveling a lot, and simply forgot.  But that’s only partly true.  ‘Cause you see, there were times when I thought about it.  And I simply didn’t do it.

I stopped taking action right at the point of the harvest.  The point where it was the least amount of work and the most reward.

Now this wouldn’t be that big of a deal.  But I’ve noticed I do this in other places too.  Not all the time.  But enough to notice it.  I stop right before the last step.  The step that would put me over the edge.  Accomplish something.

It’s almost as if I’m afraid to succeed.  Or afraid it might fail.  Either way, it’s neither smart nor brave.  It’s hiding.

It’s easy to come up with excuses, like I did with the basil.  But they’re just…excuses.  They don’t get me to the finish line.  And I’m tired of it.

Like I say, I haven’t done this on everything.  I’ve finished writing two songs I said I’d write.  I’ve finished work for other groups or people.  It’s my own stuff I tend to not do.  Where I haven’t made a commitment to anyone else but myself.

I know I need to cut myself some slack.  And I also know that this can very easily be an upper-limit problem.  I described this in detail in Episode 087.  That’s one reason why I purposely posted my rehearsal video of “This is Me” to YouTube last week.  And why I posted the song I just wrote too.  I need to keep practicing finishing.  Unless I decide NOT to finish something, I don’t want to simply neglect to do it.  And end up with no leaves on my basil.

Have you ever done this?  Gone all the way to the end – done all the work – and then simply didn’t do the last step?  Even when it was easy?  Did you realize you were doing it at the time, or did you only see it in hindsight?  Feel free to join the conversation.